… 13 Reasons Why I’m The Coolest Kid on the Crescent

Ever lived on residence at university? Maybe you lived in a shared residence while at (American) College? Boarding school perhaps? Well then,here’s a handy checklist to tell whether you were the coolest kid on the crescent.

1. The select group of people I know only make out with other people in the select group of people I know.

2. It’s the funniest thing in the world when I take photos of individuals from the select group of people I know making out with each other.

3. When individuals from the select group of people I know are making out with each other, I find it hilarious to go “Woooooooooooooo!” and cheer like I’m at a bogan country football match.

4. I am currently (and always) drunk.

5. I’m really proud of the fact that I am making out with someone from the select group of people I know, even though I do this on a regular basis and am basically working my way through said group.

6. By breakfast the next morning, the select group of people I know know that I had sex the previous night with someone from the select group of people that I know.

7. Oh. Em. Gee. One of those people from the select group of people I know that I really like is making out with someone from the select group of people I know.

8. I’m going to go and bitch about this fact to a select group of the select group of people I know like I’m an idiodic school girl and this is literally the end of the world, despite the fact I left high school at least a year ago.

9. I immediately went for the gossip session option because I couldn’t think of any alternative, even though an open and honest dialogue with the individuals in question would’ve been a much better option and would’ve resulted in far less people being hurt.

10. I’m not really sure what the word “dialogue” means or involves.

11. This gossip session resolves literally nothing, even though it took three hours, and I’m basically going to go agains the advice that my friends offered, not because it is complete bulldust, but because I was always going to trust my own instincts in the matter anyway.

12. Penis (lol).

13. I only know a stupidly small selection of people.